


Make it Gay: Starrrr Trekkin' Across the Univerrrse (whip noise)

by Mistressaq



Series: Star Trek AU [1]
Category: RuPaul's Drag Race RPF, Star Trek
Genre: Alternate Universe - Star Trek, Amnesia, F/F, Lesbians in Space, Rare Pairings, Sex Pollen, Space Opera, all female starship crew, everyone has sex with everyone okay, lesbian sex cult, theres some Manila x Vanjie in there
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-18
Updated: 2020-03-14
Packaged: 2021-02-27 13:14:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 16,993
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22297642
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mistressaq/pseuds/Mistressaq
Summary: Inspired Star Trek: the Original Series season 1 episode 24 "This Side of Paradise"Nina West, captain of theFSS: Sapphoinvestigates why the away team has stopped communicating with the Bridge. On the good side, she finds her missing crew members. On the bad side, they're naked. In a lake. Cavorting with (also nude) locals. On a planet that's not supposed to HAVE any locals.
Relationships: Brooke Lynn Hytes/Kameron Michaels, Brooke Lynn Hytes/Nina West, Brooke Lynn Hytes/Vanessa Vanjie Mateo, Brooke Lynn Hytes/Vanessa Vanjie Mateo/Kameron Michaels, many others - Relationship
Series: Star Trek AU [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1664185
Comments: 13
Kudos: 14





	1. Naked in a Lake

**Author's Note:**

> Because theres a lot of characters...here's a quick guide to the main players  
> Nina West: Captain (formerly Chief Medical Officer)  
> Brooke Lynn Hytes: Chief Science Officer  
> Ra’Jah O’Hara: Assistant to Chief Science Officer  
> Asia O’Hara: Chief Medical Officer  
> Kameron Michaels: Chief Security Officer  
> Vanessa Mateo: Assistant to Chief Security Officer  
> 

Red and blue uniform tops, black trousers and golden neckerchiefs littered the footpath up the slight hill like a trail of fabric breadcrumbs. Captain West noted with a sinking in her stomach that her crew members and friends were nowhere to be seen. She pushed away old-fashioned ideas of people evaporating into thin air, leaving only their clothes. Well, their clothes and their former friends. The stories had called it a rapture, of people en masse being pulled into the heavens. Nina took a deep breath. Let the anxious, catastrophizing thoughts go.

Her comm chimed. She hit the button and let out a terse “Still alive” before silencing the thing. Nina could picture Katya at the reception board, sucking her teeth, eyes narrowing before she’d shrug off the captain’s rudeness and go back to filing her nails. 

A noise struck Nina from her revery. A very human sounding noise. And a familiar human noise. It was a cackly, raspy, foghorn of a laugh. Nina’s heart soared as she sprinted up the extra few meters to the crest of the hill. She stopped in her tracks at the utterly puzzling sight before her. 

On the down slope of the hill, Nina stood upon, there was a small rocky beach and a navy blue lake, some fifty meters across. To the shallower part of the near side of the lake were five or six human figures. Three she recognized as members of her lost away team: Security Officer Vanessa Mateo, whose laugh had given her away, Chief Science Officer Brooke Lynn Hytes, one of Captain West’s oldest friends, and Chief Security Officer Kameron Michaels. There was something deeply unsettling about Hytes and Michaels, and it took a good thirty seconds for Nina to process it. Two of her coldest officers were acting uncharacteristically playfully. 

What’s more, as Nina continued to try to wrap her head around what she was seeing, she would come to understand that what she was watching was her away team, having shirked their duties to their Captain and the Federation, skinny dipping with locals. The more she stared and stared, the less she could comprehend it. 

There was Brooke, her long hair pulled down from its usual practical updo, and her long arm wound into the water, seeming to hold onto Vanessa’s waist. Meanwhile, Vanessa was somehow slung around Kameron like a backpack, only on her front. The Chief Security Officer had somehow managed to not wet her chin-length auburn hair, but Nina couldn’t see either Mateo or Michaels’ faces because they were so intensely pressed together. Vanessa rolled her hips and _oh--_

Right.

Captain West found herself overcome with the feeling that she shouldn't be seeing what she was seeing. Because this was improper and unethical in so many ways-- that’s her chief security officer with her assistant. Well, now she’s more handing her assistant off to the chief science officer and… yeah, that feeling of wrongness wasn’t going away. 

Nina, without thinking, flipped open her communicator and said the three words to get herself out of the situation. 

“Beam Me Up.”

\---

They flowed together like the water that joined them, connecting and disconnecting in a swirling, natural rhythm. The rocky bottom was too deep for Vanessa to stand on; she allowed herself to be handed off from one lover to the next. Brooke held her while Kam played with her, while Brooke kissed Kameron and Vanessa kissed Brooke and Kameron pressed her lips to Vanessa’s shoulder. Vanessa could barely keep her eyes open, the world around them was so bright and full of reflections and refractions and the swirling of motion and the vibrancy of life itself. 

They approached multiple climaxes again and again, always holding off, never going quite that far. Going to completion meant it would end, and they were not interested in the ending or the beginning, only the being. Vanessa only opened her eyes a crack when she felt an unfamiliar presence approaching their trio. One presence split in three, or perhaps only two. There was an unfamiliar hand which placed itself delicately on Vanessa’s hip. Unfamiliar, but not unwanted. Vanessa pressed her forehead into the neck of whichever one was holding her. She couldn’t tell anymore, they had blended into one. 

Tentatively, Vanessa opened only one eye. Blinking to adjust to the harsh sunlight reflected in the glassy waters around them, she identified another woman. Tan, statuesque, with a long face, brown eyes and sizable tits. She looked at Vanessa with kindness. Vanessa found the woman’s hand and wound their fingers together. Brooke/Kameron shifted Vanessa’s weight to their other hip, allowing her to lean over to Brown Eyes. 

Brown eyes had full, kissable lips. Vanessa ran her finger over those lips, anchoring herself before she dove in. Brown Eyes had lovely lips, lovely hair, lovely tits, such smooth skin, Vanessa let herself fall deeper and deeper in love. There was a slip, and she came unrooted from Kameron/Brooke. Gratefully, Brown Eyes was there to keep her afloat. 

Familiar and unfamiliar hands drew lines on her shoulders and chest. Kameron/Brooke pulled her back in, and Vanessa was once again with them. There was some rocking, and the other presence she’d sensed grew its own face. She was also gorgeous, also with tan skin, but a thinner nose, rounder cheeks and eyes like storm clouds. She was the one who was now behind Kameron, running her long fingers up and down her lean body like a musical instrument. Vanessa smiled, feeling in her own body the pleasure her lover was being given. 

They communicated with eyes, hands, bodies, movement. All one body, connected by the churning water. For a moment, when she heard a voice speak, she didn’t recognize the language. But she knew what was said, and she followed the rest of the movement, let the waves of limbs all around guide her, like wind in a sail. It wasn’t until she was walking on the pebbly shore, heading toward a hub of earthen bungalows with thatched roofs, that she finished processing the voice and the words. She did not know which face the voice belonged to, but she knew its message:

_Come along and follow us, to Eden._

\---

 _“This_ is why, West. This is _exactly_ why we don’t send single person away teams!”

Officer Ganache was not wrong. Nina had safeworded without the slightest preparation of what she was going to say to her crew about the lost away team. She couldn’t make sense of what she had seen. It could have been a mirage or a hallucination. She insisted Asia examine her blood for toxins and strange chemicals. Nina couldn’t tell how long she stayed locked in her private chambers before Head Administrator Cyril “Silky” Ganache let herself in, demanding some kind of an explanation.

Captain Nina West could only give a shrug, her eyelids still singed with the motion of the figures in the water. The repercussions of her sharing that information. Their careers. Their lives, families -- and who were those local women? Nina had only been able to focus on her friends, but the locals, she recalled, were gorgeous as well. Not that-- not that she thought of her subordinates that way-- not that she would ever-- “For everybody’s sake,” she told Silky. “We’re going to… forego further intervention to wait for the results of the tox screen.”

 _“Captain,”_ implored Silky, her knuckles discoloring as she clutched the back of a chair. “If our girls could be in _any_ danger--”

Nina’s brows furrowed. “I don’t… I don’t feel like they’re in any danger.”

“You can’t be sure.”

“I suppose I can’t, but… it doesn’t feel like there’s anything… to be afraid of.” Nina shut her eyes and rubbed the insides of her wrists against her eye sockets. God, listen to her. “I just. Stand by. And let me know when there are any results.”

She still wasn’t looking, but she felt Silky do that thing with her face, the pouting of the lips, scrunching of eyebrows, and she heard the telltale heavy breath. Nina smiled. Silky hated the idea of leaving their girls out there, she disapproved of Nina’s decision, and she was frustrated, but she’d follow Nina’s direction. She’d see that things got done in the meantime. 

“Thank you,” Nina sighed and fell back into her double bed. Silky gave a noncommittal hum in response.

Even though she’d gotten a full 8 hours last night, Nina was asleep before her door vacuum-sealed behind Silky.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title from Trail to Oregon by starkid productions. :)


	2. Our Lady

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> all aboard for the sex train! Choo choo!

They were led up fluorescent green hills and into the calming shadow of a gargantuan, ancient tree. Thatch-roofed huts made of clay looked like kids' playhouses. There were more beautiful women in these huts, floating from one to another. The women wore flowing linens, cinched at the waist with a rope and tied about the neck. A breeze caressed them all and no one was at all bothered that no one was wearing underwear. One woman picked up a ceramic jug and poured out glistening water into a bowl. Vanessa gravitated toward it, but was shepherded back to the group by Grey Eyes. 

_There will be time for replenishing,_ said someone. _First, we present you to Our Lady._

Our Lady sat on a hand-dyed green rug, cross-legged and in deep thought. Behind and to either side of her stood two shorter, tanner women whose dyed fabric sashes picked them out as higher in station than everyone else. 

The guides kneeled, and so did the ones being presented. Our Lady’s skin seemingly glowed from inside, like Egyptian alabaster. Her eyes, when they opened under dark lashes like palm fronds, were a rich brown that reminded Vanessa of fertile soil. Her raven hair had a single beige stripe falling from her elegant scalp. 

The woman stood and paced around the room. Another breeze wound its way through the door, blowing through locks of hair and ruffling linens. Vanessa shifted on her heels, allowing some pressure to find her place of need. 

Her fidgeting did not go unnoticed. Our Lady dragged a delicate hand across Vanessa’s bare shoulder. Gooseflesh poked up across half her body. She felt like Eve, suddenly remembering she was naked. There were eyes from her companions she caught from the side, but the Lady focused all her attention on Vanessa. Understated, smallish Vanessa. Vanessa, who remembered that the Lady’s right hand women were short and tan like her. She cast a glance up at them, vacant eyes watching their Lady feel up and down Vanessa’s torso. 

If she hummed or moaned, it was because she could not help it. The Lady breathed into her hair and pressed against Vanessa’s tender nipples. A hand ventured between her lower lips and a spark ran through her core. Vanessa buried her face in that illustrious black mane. Her clit was circled, and she found herself as close to climax as she had ever been. But the Lady pulled back just when she knew Vanessa was close. 

Betrayed, she gazed up at her Lady for an explanation. This came not in words, but in the act of the Lady pulling her linens apart and taking a seat on her flat throne, her own sex on full display. Her eyes, those mother-earth eyes, focused only on Vanessa. Put forth her challenge.

Crawling forward on hands and aching knees, Vanessa accepted. She lapped at her Lady like a doe at a stream, taking care to suck just around the gentle nub hidden away in the safety of her folds. Vanessa felt the Lady motion to one of her lieutenants, and then there was a shuffling behind her. And there were hands spreading her knees apart. 

Vanessa glanced back long enough to tell that Kameron had been tasked with pleasuring her. She rested her front weight on her elbows and spread her legs wide open for her companion. The other woman’s tongue poked at her hole and spread her wetness around. The ball of sunlight in Vanessa's pelvis throbbed. Vanessa quickened her pace, made her ministrations more forceful as she chased that craved eruption. She ached to touch herself, but her fingers were occupied. She moaned into her Lady, feeling an oncoming shiver. 

Vanessa withdrew a hand in favor of employing more suction to the spot above the bud. She reached down to guide Kameron to press inside, but her lover was having difficulty keeping a rhythm. Vanessa didn’t dare steal another glance backward, but she imagined Brooke was now lapping at Kameron's heat and _oh_ that eruption was millimeters away. 

She whined into the Lady, begging with all of her being in one breath. At last, the Lady came, clenching down around and into Vanessa and down her face and soaking the mat and _fuck_ there’s no coming down from this because she’s coming too— seeing sparks and her lungs gasping for air and her joints giving out beneath her.

\----

A slender blonde in a blue uniform poked her head around the corner. “Knock knock.”

Acting Chief Science Officer, Ra’Jah O’Hara, raised an eyebrow and waved the girl in. “Ensign Estranga, I assume these are the results of this mornings’ botanical analyses?”

The ensign nodded. She held her clipboard stiffly, with both hands. “It took us a little longer than usual—“

O’Hara snapped her fingers, holding her palm out for the results. 

“Oh, uh, here.” The botanist handed over the clipboard and chewed on her lip. “There’s— not on the actual, thingy, is the uh, weirdness we found with, with, with the, the, the uh…” she waved her hand, looking for the word. 

“Spit it out, child.” O’Hara’s steely gaze bored into her soul.

Ensign Estranga closed her eyes and took a steadying breath. Keeping her eyes closed, she said, “There’s psychoactive agents in the flora.”

She _felt_ O’Hara stiffen. Heard her lean forward in her chair. “Go on.”

Estranga tried to remember what Nurse Miller had taught her. She interlocked her fingers and took another breath. “It was in all the samples, so it’s hard to know where it’s coming from. But like, we think it’s pollen? Because that’s airborne and uh, yeah.”

She glanced at O’Hara long enough to see she had steepled her fingertips, her shoulders tense and squared. “So what you’re saying is, any further in-person exploration needs to be conducted while using respirators.”

“Yeah. I mean, there’s a chance that might not even be, be good enough or safe enough but we’re, we’re using them in the, the, the lab, so.” She chuckled uncomfortably. “I mean, they made me take a full decontamination shower and change uniforms before sending me up to talk to you.”

O’Hara locked eyes with Estranga, small alerts going off in her mind. “You were exposed?”

“Yeah, I mean, we all were. The, the sensors, the sensors check for like, known air toxins and livable atmosphere but uh, yeah.”

The chief science officer rubbed the side of her face and scrunched her eyes shut. “So, before you all knew you were exposed to a toxin, how did you—“

“Not a toxin,” interrupted the botanist. “That’s kinda the point, the reason we didn’t know—“

“Okay, you said psychoactive,” amended O’Hara. “What are the symptoms? What do we watch out for in… others who may have also been exposed?”

“Oh!” Estranga brightened. “See it’s funny because like, I’m already spacey and stuff so while the others were like ‘why am I bumping into things’ ‘why can’t I focus?’ I didn’t notice anything was wrong until Courtney popped in to take some samples for medical and I was all like ‘woah, why do I wanna bang Courtney all of a sudden— I don’t even _like_ Courtney!’” 

Estranga laughed. O’Hara did not. She scrawled in the margins of the notes. “So, minor neurological disturbances and…” O'Hara arched a judgemental brow at the botanist. “How would you put it? Horniness? Is there a medical term for that?”

The girl shrugged. “Wrong department. Can I go now?”

“One last thing.” O’Hara flipped back through the pages on the clipboard. Looking up at the string bean of a girl, she asked, “Are you under the influence of this pollen currently?”

Estranga shrugged. “I think so. We have no way of knowing how long it lasts and it’s all hands on deck down there, so as long as we can still function at our jobs…” she gave another noncommittal shrug. 

O’Hara released her, a concerned thought running through her mind of whether the brainless botanist would be able to find her way back to R&D. Pushing that thought to the side, as it wasn’t her job to babysit the crew, O’Hara pinged medbay. “Yeah, this is Acting Chief of Science O’Hara. I’m gonna need someone to run a wellness check on the captain. Neurological. And…” She paused to wonder what the fuck she was doing. She didn’t have an answer. “Ask about her sex drive.”

—

Vanessa coughed out what little breath she could manage. The Lady’s heavy breaths sent gusts of wind down her trembling body. Brooke and Kameron, by their groans and gasps, were only now approaching their climaxes. Vanessa, still heaving and shaking, shuffled to the side. Resting her head on the packed dirt floor, she observed with delight how her companions had abandoned their positioning, having favored instead to straddle each other, middle and index fingers disappearing within their bodies. 

Our Lady must have made another silent command, as her own lieutenants joined the women on the floor. They wove fingers through hair, pressed kisses along shoulder blades, always the mirror of each other, like synchronized swimmers. 

Behind her, Vanessa felt movement. It was the Lady, righting herself to sit, legs crossed, once again on her mat. She took Vanessa by the wrist and had her rest her head in her lap as they watched the scene before them unfold together. The Lady pressed Vanessa’s hand to her cheek, rubbing circles into her skin. Her other hand she used to pet Vanessa’s head, her hair damp from the lake and from the effort of loving. 

Brooke and Kameron’s gasps came quicker, climbing, the precipice in sight. Vanessa rested her unoccupied hand over her sex, providing a gentle pressure. The Lady caressed Vanessa’s cheek. “I love you,” said Vanessa. 

A gentle voice came from above. “We all love here, dear one.”

Brooke collapsed first. Kameron caught her, only to slump forward, horribly out of breath herself. The lieutenants stood up to resume their original place in the back of the hut. 

Vanessa tilted her head to look up at her dazzling Lady. “I don’t even know your name.”

The Lady smiled. “We are all one, here. Names are irrelevant.”

Vanessa pouted her lip. “That’s Brooke Lynn and that’s Kameron,” she pointed. “And I’m Vanessa. We have to know who to thank.”

The Lady laughed an enchanting, kind-hearted laugh. Vanessa fell even more deeply in love. “In that case,” said the Lady. “You may thank my friends Jujubee and Mariah.” Vanessa did so, calling out hoarsely to two women she could no longer see but trusted were still behind her. 

The Lady traced a fingertip around Vanessa’s eye. “They acknowledge your thanks.”

“But what about you?” Vanessa asked. She bent her legs, giving her companions more space to sprawl. Brooke rested her cheek on Vanessa’s thigh. Vanessa rested a hand on Brooke's messed hair. Kameron panted against Brooke’s collarbone. “They’ll tell you, I’m stubborn,” Vanessa smiled. “I’ll keep asking ‘til I get an answer.”

The Lady hummed. Finally relenting, she leaned forward to whisper in Vanessa’s ear. “You may say it only once, and quietly.”

Vanessa nodded, her heart skipping a few beats. 

In that same rasp of a whisper, she said, “You may address your thanks to... Manila.”

Vanessa jerked her head to quickly steal a kiss on Manila’s fine lips. Giggling to herself, Vanessa closed her eyes and uttered a barely audible whisper: “Thank you, Manila.”

—-

Medbay reported back sooner than Ra’Jah had expected. It was Head Nurse Cain. “I don’t know what to tell you. She’s left her quarters. Heat signatures are present, but it looks like she left a good eight-to-twelve minutes ago.”

“Fuck.”

She ended the call with Cain, immediately smashing another call button. 

“This is Brianna with Transport.”

“Tell me you didn’t see the captain between now and ten minutes ago.”

“No, we did. Right, Mo’? Yeah, she was in, wanted to pop back down to the surface.”

Ra’Jah slammed the back of a coaster against her brow bone. “You didn’t _let the Captain go down to the planet ALONE_.”

“She’ll keep in touch.” The voice of Monét interjected over the comm. “She’s trustworthy, Raj! No reason to freak.”

Ra’Jah ended the call before she gave sensitive information to exactly the wrong people. 

_There IS a reason to freak you self-obsessed idiots! Our CAPTAIN is tripping BALLS on alien SEX POLLEN and you KNUCKLEHEADS just sent her back down to the planet ALONE to disappear along with the REST OF THE PEOPLE IN CHARGE!!!_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> waka waka, nina's joining the sex cult.


	3. Welcome to the Family

The first item of clothing Nina cast aside was her shoes. Every United Federation employee uniform included sensible, comfortable black flats. Nina unfastened hers as the first action once she touched down on the planet. She scrunched her bare toes into the cool soil, blades of grass bending beneath her weight. It was the first moment of satisfaction to her ragged soul in many weeks. She thought about lying down in the grass, contentedly gazing up at the sky. Nina even bent down to sit on the ground before a flash of white caught her eye, and she felt that pull in her chest once again.

She had no way of describing it; this sense, like a sailor’s ability to feel which direction is North, or a cat’s way of feeling a storm coming on. This feeling in her chest, which had pulled her back down to this planet, was now pulling her toward a tiny encampment on the opposite side of the lake. 

As she neared, cresting a third hill, Nina recognized a familiar form. She wore white linen, like the sheets of fabric hang-drying in between the little huts. Her light orange hair curled into natural ringlets, tattoo sleeves were on full display thanks to the sleeveless garment she wore. 

Kameron looked up just in time to see Nina excitedly jogging down the hill towards her. She opened her arms, accepting Nina immediately. “We are so happy you’ve come to join us,” she said. She called out a few names, Brooke and Sonique, and two identically-dressed ladies joined them at the edge of the modest village. 

Brooke had her long hair in a plait down her back, long blades of grass and flowers interwoven with her flaxen locks. The woman Sonique had small braids along her scalp leading to her crown, where her spindly golden-brown hair exploded into a lovely puff. Nina found Sonique's silver eyes striking against the bronze of her skin. _Sonique,_ thought Nina, _a woman crafted of precious metals._

The woman caressed Nina’s cheeks, held her chin, looked deep into her eyes. Never did she feel uncomfortable with these gorgeous women greeting her. They appraised her like a fine statue, one accepted to be beautiful, the contemplation of which is not to search for a flaw in the work but to appreciate every aspect of the piece. Sonique walked her fingers around the waistline of Nina’s uniform. Her eyes met Nina’s and her delicate fingers pinched the fabric, pulling at it slightly. Nina, immediately understanding, lifted her arms to let the women undress her. 

Her top removed, Sonique’s hand traced lines from Nina’s collarbone, down her sternum, under her breasts -- making Nina shiver -- and finally to the top of her trousers. Now the women rotated, and Sonique went to tracing the mountains and valleys of Nina’s shoulder blades, back muscles and spine. Meanwhile, Kameron pulled pins and clips from Nina’s head, freeing more and more of her sandy blonde curls. It was Brooke who kneeled before Nina, taking hold of both sides of her dress pants, and slid the clasps apart. Nina breathed more deeply. Brooke gently guided the black fabric down her legs, pressing her nose to Nina’s soft thigh as soon as it was exposed. Nina stepped out of her pants. A cool breeze made the surrounding linens flutter, and Nina wrapped her arms around herself. “Can I get one of those nice robes?” she asked, motioning toward the garments the others wore. 

Kameron pulled the last pin from Nina’s hair and swiped a lock behind her ear. Leaving her fingers under Nina’s jaw, she smiled. “All in good time.”

Nina felt a contentment ease into her chest, soothing her nerves, melting away her worries. Kameron saw it happen in her face, and uttered soft words that got lost on their journey through the breeze. Nina didn't need to know what she had said. She understood. She reached out with her cool hand and took Kameron's in her own. Kameron leaned forward and softly kissed Nina. Nina returned the gesture, kissing back, and gently squeezing Kameron's hand. Kameron used her other hand to cup Nina's cheek, pulling her in further. Meanwhile, Nina felt Sonique's hands pressing and massaging her back and shoulder muscles, and Brooke was pressing kisses to her thighs, getting closer and closer to her center.

Nina's core clenched in anticipation, in excitement, over all the hands and mouths exploring her body with no fear or judgement. Her heart stuttered in her chest and she felt somehow close to crying already. She forced herself to pull back from Kameron's generous kiss, breathing heavily already. The other movements around her body also slowed down, waiting. Nina looked into Kameron's eyes, then down at Brooke. She detatched her hand from Kameron's and reached down to touch Brooke's soft jawline. With her other hand, she reached out behind her, looking for Sonique. The grey-eyed woman placed a delicate hand in Nina's palm and held on securely. 

"What is it?" asked one of the three women.

Nina glanced at each of her companions again, and felt the ease return. "Just... thank you."

Someone -- maybe Sonique -- uttered an "aww." The others pressed chaste kisses to Nina's nearest exposed skin. It was definitely Brooke, though, who said "Welcome to the family" before licking a stripe up Nina's clit.

\---

“Bridge to R&D. Requesting status update.”

Officer April Carrion, Acting Head of R&D, hit the button next to the speaker on her desk. “Nothing new in the last half hour.”

At that precise moment, Carrion noticed a tiny nurse with a clipboard headed her way. “R&D to Bridge. An update may be coming now. Stand by.” 

Nurse Act let herself in, as she’d been instructed, and didn't even speak before handing over the results. To anyone else, she would have started talking about the results immediately, but for Carrion, she held her tongue. She could only watch the other woman’s steely gaze skim the pages of the report as quickly as possible. Finally, Carrion looked up. “So it just confirms what we already know?”

“Yes and no.” Courtney took a seat in front of the desk. April’s name may not be on the plaque on the door outside, but she was _certainly_ the boss right now. “So, yes, we see the psychoactive agent in the captain’s blood, and since she didn’t eat anything, we assume it’s airborne. Um. It’s not self-replicating which is good. We would have liked to be able to see how her liver’s breaking down the stuff but for er, obvious reasons we can’t so we’re thinking maybe an artificial liver—“

Carrion’s forehead creased. “What do you mean an artificial liver?”

“Well, we could expose the blood to liver enzymes—“

Carrion pressed her palms together and held her hands in front of her mouth. “You do know… there are literally two other people in this department who have been exposed.” Courtney stared blankly. Carrion pointed at her mouth as she exaggerated her words: “Test. Them.”

The proverbial lightbulb went off above Courtney’s head. The nurse leapt up, thanked her superior, and went brisk-walking back to the botanical/geological lab. 

April let out a string of hollow, humorless laughs and pressed her forehead to the back of her hands on the desk. The speaker pinged. The voice of Katya Zamolodchikova, head of communications, hummed through. “Bridge standing by for status update.”

April slammed the button. “Permission to fire nurse Act?”

Katya sounded genuinely curious. “On what grounds?”

“Incompetency,” groaned April.

“Mm. Unfortunately, we’re all-hands-on-deck, so permission is gonna be denied.”

“Thought so.”

“Keep us updated.”

April sighed with her entire upper body. This whole situation was a planet-sized shitshow.

—-

When the second three-person away team materialized on the planet, half their faces were covered by ventilators. They’d decided to go for oxygen packs, even though it wasn’t strictly called for. The crew could not afford to lose another three servicewomen.

“So,” said Ra’Jah, her voice staticky over the ventilator. “Life signs are due southeast. We’re gonna walk.”

Chief Medical Officer, Asia O’Hara (no relation to acting captain Ra’Jah D. O’Hara) spoke up. “And we didn’t just beam right down where the life signs are because…?” 

_“Because,”_ replied Ra’Jah. “We don’t know who these locals are or how advanced their society is. We don’t want to scare them with our sparkly disappearing act.”

“Mm, and our black and blue space suits and the fact that we sound like Darth Vader won’t do that.”

Ra’Jah shot Asia a glare. Asia, in turn, offered up her classic, pageant-winning smile. Ra’Jah rolled her eyes and longed to be a part of the alternate future where Asia stuck to entertainment instead of going into medicine. She clicked her tongue and gestured toward her command gold uniform top. “I don’t know if you need Nurse Act to give you an eye exam, but _I_ am not wearing blue.”

Asia rolled her eyes. “Both your commanding officers end up missing on a barely-populated planet and all that temporary power goes to your head.”

“Just-- shut up, okay? You’re wasting oxygen.”

 _“You’re_ wasting oxygen--”

“Guys!” Until now, Ensign Estranga had remained in a thoughtful quiet. She now pointed in the distance, at the gathering of huts in the shade of a hundred-foot-tall elm. “That’s what we’re looking for. I’m a hundred percent.” 

The three women headed off toward the encampment. “I mean I’m a botanist, not an anthropologist, so I don’t know a lot about human made structures or even if these people are humans or if these people are people-- if these life forms are--”

“You did an excellent job, sweetie. We’re very grateful to have you.” Asia cut her off before Ra’Jah could get a chance to tell someone to shut up for the second time in five minutes. 

As they approached, they saw women flitting two and fro between the little earthen bungalows. Most wore linen gowns or robes, but some wore nothing at all. Ra’Jah shook her head. “Christ, it’s a goddamn commune.”

“Looks fun,” said Ensign Estranga. “D’you see the captain anywhere?”

“Not yet,” said Asia. “I hope she’s one of the ones wearing clothes, at least.”

“It shouldn’t be that hard,” reasoned the botanist. “I mean, the captain’s too big to fit in any of those tents -- except maybe that one in the back. That one looks important.”

“Another astute observation,” Ra’Jah said under her breath. 

“What’d you say, Ra’j?” asked the ensign. “I couldn’t hear you ‘cause of the mask.”

“Nothing important.”

By this point, the commune had taken notice of the approaching away team. One woman leaned around a bungalow to speak to someone unseen. Two women set down ceramic water jugs and started to walk toward the crew members. As they drew closer, more women followed from a distance. Ra’Jah stopped when there was about five feet between the meeting parties. She examined the women’s faces, but did not recognize them. One had a long, slightly pointed nose and frizzy red hair. The other was white, blonde, and forgettable. They watched Ra’Jah and her crew members like they were waiting for something.

Of course, it was Asia who said oh so discreetly into her microphone: “Are you gonna say something or…”

Ra’Jah took a step forward. The commune women followed suit. Ra’Jah realized she had not planned how this confrontation would go down at all. “We’re with the United Federation of Planets,” she began. _That’s a good way to start off, right?_

She looked for recognition in the women, but they only stared with a pleasant blankness. _They’re high,_ Ra’Jah had to remind herself. She lowered her bar, and started talking with her hands. “We’re looking for our captain, about yea high, giant, viking shoulders. Goes by Nina?” 

This time, the women smiled and nodded. “We know who you seek.” 

All three star fleet women relaxed their shoulders. They were mostly relieved that the women spoke English in the first place. Electronic translators were a bitch. When the acting captain asked to be taken to Nina, the women began to… to explore the dimensions of Ra’Jah with their fingers. Now, the star fleet explorers knew to go into foreign contact with tolerance first. So, she allowed the touch to occur, assuming it to be some form of greeting custom. After a minute or so, the blonde one touched her ventilator mask. Ra’jah held up her palms and stepped back. The commune women looked at each other in curiosity for a brief moment before each taking one of Ra’Jah’s wrists, and leading her to their village. Asia and Estranga followed eight feet behind, keeping watchful eyes out for any familiar faces.

The acting Chief Officers and botanist found their AWOL captain clothed (thankfully) in linen. She reclined against a tree, chewing on white grapes which were being dangled into her mouth while another girl crooned and strummed a tiny harp. 

The sight was so insane, Ensign Estranga blasted a laugh before her hand flew to her mouth. Given that she was still wearing her ventilator, all that accomplished was making a loud enough noise to draw the attention of their lost captain and the others who were around her. 

“Captain,” said Ra’Jah. “We need you to return to the ship.”

Nina only looked at them like all the other women had. Like they were strange, fascinating wild animals.

There was no sign of recognition anywhere in her face.


	4. "You Ask Too Many Questions"

“Captain,” said Ra’Jah. “We need you to return to the ship.”

Nina only looked at them like all the other women had. Like they were strange, fascinating wild animals. There was no sign of recognition anywhere in her face. 

“Captain,” Ra’Jah tried again. 

Asia stepped forward. “Nina.”

Something crossed the captain’s face, but was gone just as quickly as it had appeared. She looked to the woman feeding her and held up her hand. The other woman put the grapes into a cloth napkin and walked away with it. Nina stood up and looked over the starship crew members again, still saying nothing. 

“It’s weird seeing her not in her uniform, isn’t it?” Estranga whispered loudly. 

Ra’Jah shot her a look. Turning back to the captain, she tried again. “Nina, we have a ventilator for you. You need to put it on.”

Asia pulled her backpack off and pulled the gadget out, 

Nina’s eyebrows arched. “I will do no such thing,” she said evenly. “I don’t know who told you my name, but I do not know you.”

“You do, though!” said Estranga. “I mean, maybe not me ‘cause I’m just a botanist. But like, you see Asia every day. You see Ra’Jah at least that much.”

Nina pressed her lips into a line and sat down once again. She turned to the harpist. “Trixie, dear,” she said. “Would you come closer?"

The girl did, and when she stood, the team saw what looked like blooming bruises in various states of healing along her neck and chest. Estranga gasped. “D’you think they get beaten?!”

Asia shook her head. “Not that kinda bruise, hon.”

Nina dragged her fingers through Trixie’s hair. “You strangers are not interested in joining our family,” she said. “That much is clear. It would be best for you to move on.”

The away team stood agape, no idea how to proceed. After a few minutes of glancing back and forth at one another, their captain wrapped her arms around the harpist and started nuzzling into her neck. Whether they liked it or not, the crew simply had to move on.

And move on they did, though after another hour of hanging around the commune they were no closer to returning their shipmates to their posts. After Nina sent them away, Asia noticed Brooke among the launders. Her long blonde hair was plaited out of her face and she was scrubbing a woven rug against a handmade washboard. Like Nina before her, Brooke recognized her name. Yet, Asia and Ra’Jah had become strangers to her too. Another woman handed Brooke a cut-open lemon to use on the rug, and she sent the Starfleet crew away so she could return to her work. 

Kameron they found whooping and laughing, standing in a bucket, crushing berries between her toes. She seemed to be having such a gay old time, the team only watched from a distance, never bothering to interrupt. After a good while, Ensign Estranga put to words what her shipmates were thinking. “They sure do seem to fit in, don’t they? Kinda like… they’ve been here for years.”

Asia sighed in silent, dismayed agreement. Ra’Jah, ever the problem-solver, shook her head. “They just don’t remember,” she said, seemingly to herself. “How do we get them to remember?”

Asia weaved a blade of grass between her fingers. “We have no idea how the pollen works. How long it lasts.”

“Okay, what _do_ we know?” prompted Ra’Jah with a clap. 

Asia stared into the soil. Estranga looked between the disheartened doctor and Ra’Jah. “Uh…” she said. “It’s something in the pollen.”

“What, specifically, in the pollen?”

Estranga scratched her ear. “We… we got the samples like, this morning? It’s a little early to… to know exactly how stuff works. I mean maybe the lab has some theories, if you wanna check in with the ship--”

“I have Katya sending me the updates as they come. We’ve got absolutely _nothing_ new.” Frustration crackled at the edges of her words.

“And we’re also accomplishing nothing down here,” surmised Asia. “The way I see it, they’re in no present danger here. Of course we have no way of knowing how long it’ll stay all kumbaya, but this little society is advanced enough to have laundry and musical instruments and they speak English. I feel like _they’ve_ at least been here a while.”

“So, we do what,” asked Ra’Jah. “Just, go back to the ship? Sit on our thumbs?”

Asia shook her head. “We need time. Time to regroup, time to let the lab figure shit out. Time to do some research on our own.”

Ra’Jah folded her arms across her chest. “Officer O’Hara, I see that look. What’s cooking up in that head of yours?”

Asia’s forehead creased. “They speak English. They’re organized, they’re clean… There's something…” She shook her head to clear her thoughts. “I’m eager to get back to the ship’s databases. There’s something more here than a simple colony. And they’re all women-- you noticed, right?”

“Maybe we just haven’t seen the men,” suggested Ra’Jah. “Away on a hunting trip?”

Asia took a step forward. “No, all _adult_ women. No one underage. Not a toddler, not a teenager. Not to mention there’s not supposed to _be_ a colony here at all.”

“People colonize illegally,” said Estranga. “I should know, I was raised on an unlicensed settlement.” 

Ra’Jah and Asia shot Estranga identical quizzical looks. The botanist just shrugged. The acting captain held up a hand for Asia to hold. Asia took Ra’Jah’s hand, squeezed her fingers. “So… what’s your thinking here? What direction are these observations pointing?”

Asia pursed her lips. “I can’t know until I hit the databases--”

“Right, right. _But…”_

“But…” continued Asia. “The captain doesn’t remember us. Doesn’t remember she’s a captain. Doesn’t know what the United Federation or Starfleet even is.”

“Mhm.”

“So… these women could be anyone, and they probably wouldn’t remember either.”

“Yeah…”

“So I’m thinking,” said Asia, drawing out the word. “I’m thinking of looking into what Starfleet crews are unaccounted for. ‘Cause they’re all the right age, and young enough that It’d be recent, you know.”

Ra’Jah felt it click. “Oh my God. Do you really think--”

“It’s just speculation.”

Estranga jumped in. “Could we have found survivors of a _shipwreck?!_ You guys, we’d be heroes!”

Asia held up a finger. _“Only_ if we find evidence to back it up. Nobody gets too excited, okay? First priority is getting our captain back. _Then_ we work on investigating why this colony is here in the first place.”

___

The evening sun cast the landscape in orange, peach, pink and gold. Fires had been lit in the center of the village and nuts were being toasted over the crackling flames. Trixie strummed her harp; another girl followed along on ukulele; a third bowed a beaten up violin. The rest clapped along to the rhythm and not a single one was off beat. 

As one untrained chorus, the women belted out the old hymns, as best they could remember.

_Going out tonight_

_feelin alright_

_gonna let it all hang out_

_Wanna make some noise_

_really raise my voice_

_Yeah I wanna scream and shouuut_

_The best thing about being a woman_

_Is the prerogative to have a little fun_

_Woah-oh-oh get in the action_

_Feel the attraction_

_Color my hair, do what I dare_

_Woah-oh-oh I wanna be free, yeah_

_To feel the way I feel_

_Man! I feel like a woman!_

After the old spirituals and ballads had been sung-along to and the last vestiges of color had fled from the sky, the women turned in for the night. As there was not enough space in the huts for everyone to lie down, the newcomers were asked to sleep under the stars and keep the fire until the second watch. Vanessa, who had spent all her time up to this point at Our Lady’s feet, stared blankly into the fire. 

Nina sat beside her and draped a shawl over her slight shoulders. She embraced the girl with her right arm and Vanessa rested her head against Nina’s collarbone. Brooke and Kameron snickered, gossiping about how Vanessa had been so unceremoniously booted out into the cold. Vanessa threw her head back, pouting her lip defiantly. “DeLa says we’ll be building another hut starting tomorrow.”

“Mm,” said Kameron. “I’m sure that’s what you had on your mind all day.”

Vanessa’s eyes were aflame, enough to make the women avert their eyes and raise their hands, leaving the subject as it was. Hands and feet stretched toward the warmth of the fire. Brooke and Kameron mimicked Nina and Vanessa, huddling together for warmth. 

“I wonder,” mused Nina. “If we shouldn’t all sit on the same side of the fire.”

“Well _I’m_ not moving,” said Vanessa, her eyes closed, already half asleep. Kameron and Brooke shared a knowing look before pulling each other up to sit back down on Vanessa’s other side. Brooke stretched her arm over Vanessa’s, and, due to the length of her limbs compared to Vanessa’s, curled her fingers into the small hairs at the back of Nina’s neck. Kameron pulled her knees to her chin and tucked her cold toes beneath Brooke before winding her arms around the other woman’s abdomen. 

“God, why are your toes so cold?” Brooke fidgeted. 

Kameron wiggled her toes, making Brooke squeal and squirm even more. “Why is your ass so bony?” 

“It’s not bony, it’s muscular.”

“Oh my God, both of you shush!” snapped Vanessa. 

Kameron and Brooke bit down on their tongues, lips, cheeks. Alas, once commanded to silence, neither was able to keep said command. They spewed forth cackles and squeals like raucous birds, motivated by sheer hysteria.

After only a few minutes, one of Our Lady’s lieutenants burst forth from the main hut. “I’m taking the first watch,” she said with an air of irritation. “Vanessa is welcome to my spot on the mat.”

“Thank God,” groaned Vanessa. She untangled herself from the others and hustled off to the nice, warm bungalow. She could hardly wait to curl back against Manila’s side for the night.

The lieutenant, Mariah, took a branch from the fire and reshuffled the ashes. 

“That was kind of you,” said Nina. 

“Someone had to volunteer,” said Mariah. “Keep an eye on those two.”

‘Those two,’ as Mariah referred to them, had shifted in position to lie missionary-style facing the fire. Brooke peppered kisses along Kameron’s entire face while the other pretended to be fast asleep. Nina anticipated the crack of laughter to burst out any minute now. 

Nina laid back and gazed at the sky. _Different sky,_ she thought. Then she wondered why she’d thought that. This line of wondering fuzzed over, and she turned to Mariah with another quandary. “What are we watching for?”

Kameron broke— instead of howling cackles, this time, she curled in on herself, wheezing with silent laughter. Brooke pressed her face into Kameron’s neck, eliciting raspy breathing and flailing of limbs.

Mariah turned back to Nina. “You say something?”

Nina rested her temple on her fist. “We are first watch, correct? What are we watching for?”

Mariah tilted her head to one side. “We watch over the fire.”

“What happens if we all fall asleep and it goes out?” asked Nina.

“That is why we _don’t_ fall asleep while watching over the fire.”

Nina meditated on the blaze. “It must have happened once.”

“Not that I recall.”

Nina rolled onto her side. She regarded Mariah with a childlike curiosity, digging shallow lines in the mixture of ash and soil. “How long have you all been here?”

Mariah sighed and turned away from the fire to join Nina on the ground. Looking into Nina’s fair eyes in the golden firelight, Mariah seemed to decide something. Leaning forward, she connected their lips. Nina returned the kiss for the breath it lasted before Mariah leaned back again. She traced her fingers over Nina’s round chin. “You ask too many questions.” With that, she leaned in once more, all but abandoning her watch of the fire.


	5. The Good News

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> huge thanks to Crazy4Kameron, without whom, these last 3 chapters would not exist.

Back on board _the Sappho,_ Acting Captain Ra’Jah O’Hara awoke after just five hours of sleep. She immediately paged the Bridge. It wasn’t Katya this time, it was Ensign Yuhua Hamasaki. “Updates on R&D?” 

The cheer in Yuhua’s voice grated on O’Hara’s nerves, but the news was good. “Oh yeah! There’s actually been a breakthrough. You can get dressed and head on down. April wants to tell you face to face.”

Ra’Jah pumped her fist, all but leaping out of her bedclothes and into her uniform. She wasted a good five seconds questioning if she should even bother with the uniform at all. Hell no— what kind of a captain was seen in her nightwear?! 

It was in the lift down to R&D that Ra’Jah realized that she’d put on the wrong top— she’d gone for the science blue instead of command gold. She was captain until Nina returned, how would anyone know she was in charge? That’s the POINT of uniforms! And she’d put it on backwards to boot. She was close to doing a 180 and sprinting back to her quarters, before remembering the reason she’d rushed out in the first place.

Officer April Carrion didn’t think twice about O’Hara’s uniform breech. With ecstatic eyes weighed down by mauve bags, she delivered the best news Ra’Jah had heard all week. “We isolated the protein, we know what’s causing it, we’re reverse engineering a neutralizing agent. It should be done, providing no disasters, by this afternoon.”

Ra’Jah screamed with joy.

\---

Even better news came from Asia who, as she’d said, had combed through the databases during the break. “I’m not into guessing games kinda drama, but look.” She pulled up the crew photo of the _FSS: Magnaven,_ which suffered damage, then went off-grid two Alpha Earth rotations ago. “Now, tell me if any of these faces look familiar to you. I have my hypotheses, but you take a look.”

Ra’Jah zoomed in on the picture of the _Magnaven’s_ captain. Her hair was black and sleek, but she had one section of hair at the front which was beige. That would be pretty identifying, and she didn’t remember it. Still, Ra’Jah filed away the face, the hair, and the name Manila Luzon, for later use. “What about a, uh, remember Nina called the harp player Trina? Trinity?”

“I think it was Trixie,” said Asia. The Chief Medical Officer zoomed out and back in, focusing the image on a girl on the second line from the top. “This face look familiar?”

Ra’Jah bit her lip. “I didn’t try and get a good look at her face. It might be.”

Asia opened the crewmembers file, which was accessed via pop-up over her face. “See, I earmarked this one. Her name is Beatrice Mattel, also known as…” Asia highlighted the listed nickname for Ra’Jah. 

“Holy shit.”

“Now, one crew member-- could be a coincidence, right?” Asia proposed.

“Of course.”

Asia let herself get caught up in the excitement. “Okay, but you remember the one with the red hair and the pointed nose, right?”

“Definitely.” One of the ladies who had greeted them. Her, at least, Ra’Jah remembered.

Asia panned over to a different face, on the same level as Trixie. Sure enough, the milky skin, frizzy red hair and beaklike nose stuck right out in Ra’Jah’s memory. “HOLY SHIT!” The Acting Captain smacked Asia on the back, perhaps a little harder than intended. “Okay, two people, that _can’t_ be a coincidence.”

“It’s significantly less likely than one,” Asia said. “D’you wanna know which quadrant the _Magnaven_ got damaged in?”

Ra’Jah folded her hands as if in prayer. “Please tell me it was this one. Please say Quad Three.”

Asia was unable to wipe the smile from her face. “It was quad three.” 

Ra’Jah fist-pumped in the air. 

“More specifically, their shields were damaged by a passing EMF wave and then they got held up by a band of Scavengers who took their dilithium crystals and left them to drift. Considering the time of year-- I’m a doctor, not an astrophysicist, but what I know is the different pulls of gravity at the time could have sent them toward the planet right below us. It doesn’t have a name by the way, I think we should call it Billitis.”

Ra’Jah, so caught up in their discovery and riding high over April’s good news, had no problem with assigning the planet a name. And why shouldn’t Asia name it? The Federation would name it some unpronounceable string of letters and numbers; they might as well give this livable planet a real name. Plus, Bilitis sounds like the name of a planet anyway. "Sure. Only-- what’s Bilitis mean?”

Asia barely batted an eyelash: “Oh, she was a contemporary of the Greek poet Sappho.”

Ra’Jah broke out into a wicked grin and pointed at Asia. Asia pointed back. “Ayyyyy.”

\---

Afternoon was turning into evening when the strangers approached the commune again. This time, they dressed differently. They had shed their tight black garments in exchange for clothing more recognizable to the women. The skinny blonde girl this time was replaced with an older, tanner woman. No longer did they wear the strange masks on their faces, and in the way they presented themselves, they could see that the strangers were beautiful. 

It was Asia who suggested they change out of their uniforms for the mission tonight. “We look nothing like them,” she’d said. “That’s the first thing that’ll make them suspicious.” She suggested natural fibers, as little processed material as they could manage. 

The Chief Medical Officer had gone for a cotton slip under a long linen tunic, dip-dyed navy blue at the shoulders, allowed to drip down the rest of the garment while it dried. Ra’Jah had chosen undyed linen trousers and a flowing peasant top, dyed in dark yellow stripes. Officer Carrion chose a single shoulder toga dress, tied about the waist with hemp rope. They all wore reproduction leather flats. 

Ra’Jah, still Acting Captain (not for much longer, if they were successful tonight), carried their assets. By her side, she held a woven basket. Inside of which was a bottle of peach wine, a dozen wooden cups, as well as the disassembled pieces of their secret weapon. As she had before, Raj’ah led the way and was the first to meet the village women. 

This time, they were greeted by a different group of women, though they acted almost exactly the same. The only difference was an apprehension in their movements, a hesitation in their smiles. Ra’Jah was face to face with Trixie, the blonde harpist who’d been with the captain eating grapes yesterday. By her side was a shorter lady who looked to be a good ten or fifteen years older, with grey eyes and black hair. Ra’Jah’s heart sped up with the added knowledge that this girl had an identity. A family, somewhere, wanting to hear she was safe. And the same had to be true for the rest of these women. 

Ra’Jah swallowed her nerves, sliding back into her work persona. “We’ve come to make amends,” she said. “My colleagues and I have come to the realization that we acted rudely when we first visited you. We would be humbled if you would allow us to try again.” She held up the basket. “Plus, we brought refreshments.”

The woman with grey eyes and black hair motioned toward Officer Carrion. “We don’t know this one,” she said, her voice somehow sweet and reedy at the same time. 

“Yes.” Asia stepped forward, speaking with her hands. “This is April. She is Estranga’s superior. The little blonde one works _under_ April.” 

Trixie and her companion’s faces flooded with a happy understanding. Ra’Jah made a mental note that hierarchy wasn’t unheard of in this society. In fact, yesterday she’d spotted one woman wearing a sash over her robes, unlike anyone else she’d seen. Perhaps that was an indication the sash-wearer was higher on this commune’s social pyramid than the others. 

April smiled and introduced herself, extending her hand for a shake in what must have been a force of habit. Trixie took April’s hand but, instead of a firm shake, she examined the woman’s skin as if it was a gadget she didn’t understand. Officer Carrion, ever polite, simply let the blonde woman investigate until looking back up at April, at which point the officer pulled back. It seemed the ladies of the commune had learned from yesterday that their visitors didn’t appreciate touching so much. Thus, they remained friendly, but hands-off, for the most part. 

Ra’Jah found herself fascinated by the fact that the women could remember their personal space preferences from the previous day, but Nina, who had only been among them for a few hours, remembered nothing of her life before joining the other women on the planet. Her scientific mind was on fire, but she wasn’t leading this away team as a scientist. She led it as the captain. She couldn’t afford to lose herself in these quandaries. They had a goal to achieve.

It was the grey-eyed woman who led the crew on a tour of their little neighborhood. Trixie had excused herself, ‘to tell Our Lady the good news.’ Ra’Jah glanced at Asia for a second. Our Lady sounded like an authority figure. This would be essential to know. She wondered what member of the _Magnaven_ ’s crew had risen to the top of this society. Would it still be the captain? Was the captain, the one with the black hair and the blonde streak, the leader? Or had someone usurped the original Lady in Charge? It seemed that there were enough women here to run a starship, but what trials had they overcome in getting to this communist utopia? How many had they lost?

While they were led toward the huts in the shade of the massive tree, Ra’Jah plotted some questions to ask. She tried inquiring as to how long they had been living in these huts, only to receive a vague non-answer. She wondered if, since the pollen caused short term memory problems in brief exposure, then long-term exposure would fry the memory completely. Every question she asked seemed to stump their guide, and Ra’Jah suspected it would be the same if they questioned Trixie or any of the other ladies. The repeated insufficient answers made Ra’Jah’s skin itch. 

They managed to convince the women to take them on a tour of their home. It was mostly Asia’s pageant smile and April’s charming ability to make anyone feel at ease. Ra’Jah had never been that. She’d pretty much always been rough around the edges, sure of herself, depending only on herself. It was something she’d had to work through in the Academy-- learning to play with others. She’d never needed anyone else before, but as it was pointed out to her by her superiors multiple times, you can’t run a starship by yourself.

The women led the visitors by the firepit, which would be lit once again shortly, and in between lines of hang-drying fabric. Ra’Jah asked what their clothes were made of, and the women were able to give an answer, that there were grasslands over a hill to the East that gave lovely soft fibers when beaten. When asked how long it took to go from harvesting the grasses to wearing the material, no one could say precisely. Like the other questions Ra’Jah had asked, the ladies seemed wholly unconcerned at not having answers for every curiosity.

She had been led around to the place where the women washed the linens, and watched carefully as Brooke and someone else wring water out of wet fabric. She was fascinated, somehow, because something about this process seemed… wrong. Or maybe too right. Something about the basin itself and the washboard as well… Ra’Jah’s brain turned the image over and over, looking for the key to what was amiss. But while Ra’Jah was busy observing laundry, Asia continued to snoop around the huts. And it was behind the largest, master hut, which their guide had informed them they were not allowed to go into, that Asia made the most important discovery of the mission.

The medical officer pulled a tracking pin from her hair and furiously checked her surroundings. No one seemed to have seen her, or noticed she was missing. This was the smallest town she’d ever been in, though, so she knew she had to act fast. She twisted the pin so it clicked, then again, to be sure the _Sappho_ crew knew it was intentional. Then she reached into the wicker chest, and placed the pin on the top of one of the three stacks of hand-bound journals. There was no time -- no time to pore through the volumes like she craved. No time to connect eyewitness accounts of events to the Star Fleet records. No time to open a single journal. 

She left her pin, and watched from afar as the whole basket atomized in a shower of sparkles, to be re-assembled on the deck of the Transport wing. God help those engineers, and may they use gloves when handling such precious evidence.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> pray for me as i finish the last few chapters. I'm so close.


	6. Recollections

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As the Sappho crew get to know the ladies of the commune, their plan goes into effect, triggering flashes of memory in their former crew members.

“We usually add music to these gatherings,” said Asia. “Does anyone here play? Trixie, is it? We heard you play your harp yesterday.” Trixie beamed and held up her cup. “We’d love to hear some more soon. However, the first song is meant to be led by a wind instrument. We brought one, just in case.”

With her cue, Ra’Jah pulled out the dark wood clarinet pieces she had hidden beneath the cloth in the bottom of the basket. Though she didn’t play, she was easily able to slide the instrument together. The wood snapped into place. “Who plays?”

As expected, not one hand raised. Thankfully, too, as this stunt was the best they had to grab the trust of their crew members, the best chance they had of getting their coworkers to listen to what they had to say. The neutralizing agent in the wine would only do so much. Ra’Jah turned to her left, where, strategically, she had asked Kameron to sit. “Why don’t you give it a try, sister?”

Kameron blushed a little, holding up her hands. Ra’Jah pushed. “What’s the worst that could happen? You make a funny sound and we have a good laugh.”

Somewhat reluctantly, Kameron let Ra’Jah push the clarinet into her palm. Her whole commune, as well as the three visitors, stared at her expectantly as her fingers found a way of balancing the instrument so she was still able to reach the keys and holes. Once her hands relaxed into position, it was clear how her lips were meant to press against the mouthpiece, with the slant resting on top of her lower lip for balance. 

Somehow, Kameron felt she was sliding into a position she knew well, like coming home. There was a foreign familiarity to it all, and at the same time it relaxed her, she felt anxious. She blew a soft, cursory breath into the reed, resulting in an asthmatic sounding note. She tried again, this time experimenting with how her tongue was positioned within her mouth, stopping the flow of air briefly. At the same time, she experimented with they keys and found even more that she knew this instrument. It was a strange kind of memory. How did these visitors know? Surely they didn’t-- couldn’t know. Kameron chanced a look up at the women surrounding her. The rest of her community looked on with a generous excitement. A few weren’t even looking at her, were looking at each other. But the visitors, they stared with an intensity that made her uneasy. 

Kameron pulled her mouth off of the instrument. “What do you want me to play?” If there was a hint of irritation in her voice, the visitors showed no offense. 

“There’s this song from back in our days at the Academy,” said Ra’Jah. “You remember, April?”

“I sure do.” April smiled. She started humming this tune, and like the feel of the instrument, the progression of the chords felt like pieces of a puzzle sliding into place, though the main picture remained hidden from Kameron. It unnerved her slightly, but since she did remember the tune, she began to play it. Her fingers over the holes and the keys were stilted, her breath not quite certain, and she knew someone would be upset with her for the was she was playing. She knew it was wrong. But the visitors started singing words with the tune, and there were faces in the gathered crowd that seemed to be remembering as well. 

_Far across the distance_

_And spaces between us_

_You have come to show you go on_

It wasn’t the plan, but Ra’Jah realized the truth to the actual lyrics of the song. They’d picked ‘My Heart Will Go On’ because it was one of the most instantly recognizable songs in music history. They’d decided they had the best chance jogging the memories of their crew members with a song everyone knew. To their surprise, it didn’t just work on Nina, Brooke, Vanessa and Kameron. Even though the commune members had never sung this during the evening fireside sing-alongs, the more they listened, and once the chorus hit, everyone knew the words, and was singing at the top of their lungs.

_Near, far, wherever you are_

_I believe that the heart does go on_

When everyone else’s voices got so loud, and the energy around her swelled, Kameron started to have a hard time. She was messing up notes, and she could only kind of hear it. She was making mistakes, she was falling off rhythm. The group was carrying on without her and she was being drowned out. She was drowning. Her breath kept running out. Her head… and now there were sparkles across her vision. Someone said something at her, but Kameron didn’t hear, couldn’t hear over the sound of her own blood in her ears. 

Kameron pulled herself to her feet, ignoring the way shadows blotted out the light around her and how her head ached when she moved. She had to get air, space, distance between herself and that fire, that song that she was butchering. She was panting, shaking, eyes watering when she became aware of a silhouette a few feet away. Kameron flinched. “Don’t look at me.”

“Uh, okay.” 

It was one of the strangers’ voices. The pretty one in blue, with the friendly cheeks. Kameron wrapped her arms around herself and sunk onto her haunches in the grass. 

The stranger was still there. She asked “What are you feeling right now?”

Kameron rocked herself and let out a little moan. “Everything.”

The woman had a soft voice, and it was kind, patient. “What was happening before you started feeling like this?”

Kameron squeezed her eyes shut and felt water spill from the corners. “I… was messing it up, I was, was doing bad. And… and I haven’t felt that in a long time. But… I feel when it happened, but I can’t remember it, I know it happened I didn’t make it up—“ her voice cracked with a sob. 

_Once more you open the door_

_And you're here in my heart_

_And my heart will go on and on_

Asia realized then what horrifying consequences this antidote could have on her colleagues. This was Kameron— stoic, professional Kameron, whose job was to keep everyone else safe. But here she was, starting to remember something of her old life, and it had triggered traumatic emotions and made her feel unsafe in her own mind. Her heart started to race. She briefly considered telling Ra’Jah to nix the whole plan. Of course, she could never do that, for a multitude of reasons. But she couldn’t stand by and watch her friend hyperventilate in the dark. So she made a call. 

She approached Kameron. Sinking into a squat on the ground next to her, Asia said, “I can help you. If you’d let me, I can take you back to our ship, where there’s medicine. Where it’s calm and quiet and you can have peace as you work out these feelings.”

The look Kameron gave Asia told her loud and clear: she’d made the wrong call. “I’m not going anywhere with you,” Kameron spat. “You people are the reason this is happening! You knew— you _knew_ I could make that flute thing work. I don’t know what you are, but I don’t trust you. Stay away from me.” 

With that, Kameron stomped away, on limbs stiff with tension, back toward the group. She quickly found the head of blonde hair she was anxiously looking for, and tiptoed around hot bodies to all but collapse into Brooke’s lap. “Wow,” she barely heard Brooke say. “That must have taken a lot out of you, huh?” Her friend ran her cool fingertips over her sweaty brow, massaging her temples. “You did so good, though. I didn’t know you could play.”

Kameron moaned and curled her arms around one of Brooke’s legs. She held on for dear life as the fair-haired woman ran her hands over her shoulders, neck, and scalp. Slowly, as her mind and body synced up again, Kameron was once again able to pay attention to what was going on outside of herself and her human anchor.

The ladies around them started up on another song, and though the lyrics came back to Kameron as well, she refrained from singing. She tried to focus on the warmth of the fire, the cool ground beneath her, the movements and life of her friend beside her. Brooke had an arm slung over Kameron’s back, and was drawing lines with her fingers over Kameron’s clothes. She let herself meditate into a state where she was not afraid of her own mind anymore. She expected to rapidly forget why she had run from the group anyway. Unpleasant experiences didn’t stay long on the mind here. 

Kameron found herself drawing her own fingers up and around the muscles of Brooke Lynn’s legs. She recalled before, when the two of them and Vanessa and The Lady Manila lay on each other in the Great Hut. She hadn’t noticed then, and truthfully hadn’t been looking, but in the firelight, Kameron noticed a difference in texture between Brooke’s calves. Upon her right there was an uneven ridge, cutting halfway up the back of the muscle. As she moved her head, she was able to see the firelight bounce off of the ridge, and felt for the difference in texture. A scar. She was still tracing her fingers over the peaks and valleys when she looked back up at Brooke. “What’s this?” she asked.

Brooke glanced down to see what Kameron was talking about. “Oh.” Realization spread across her face. “It’s old. They asked if I wanted it completely erased, but I wanted to carry it with me.” She reached down to run her own fingers over the scar. “To remind myself what I had overcome before, to give me courage to face new dangers.”

Kameron wove her fingers in with Brooke’s. “How’d you get it?”

She felt her companion think on the question, as she had before her previous answer. With all the song and heat and breeze, the mind needed time to work. However, it was when her friend’s muscles went taut and her breathing froze that she knew Brooke was thinking too much. Concerned, Kameron sat up to gaze upon her friend. Her face, usually pink, especially with the heat of the fire, blanched white. Her lips hung ever so slightly open, her eyes distant at the same time they were wide open in horror. Just when Kameron was about to squeeze Brooke to try and wake her, the woman’s body thawed, only to frantically grasp at her ankle. She let out a choked crying sound, drowned out by the rest of the noise. Kameron rose to her knees, resting her hands on Brooke’s shoulder and jaw. It took a few moments, and her heart pounded with worry, but she was able to see the fog leak out from her face, revealing her friend, once again in her right mind. 

Kameron curled down to wrap her arms around Brooke, pulling her friend into an embrace. It seemed, she suspected, that whatever had possessed her had also gotten to Brooke. She did her best to control her breathing so Brooke could calm down using her as a model, but Brooke’s anxiety brought up those feelings in Kameron once more. She recalled a feeling, of being above the people she was playing for, of being depended upon, of being alone with her instrument and her fear. Of knowing whatever she did would never be good enough. That begged the question though: good enough for who?

Trying to shake such questions from her head, wonderings she didn’t have any answers to, Kameron looked around the circle, searching for one girl who might be feeling the same way. Her gaze glossed over those clapping, laughing, fully engaged in the festivities, only to land on Asia. The medicine woman’s face was sober with concern, and also that hint that told Kameron _I know._

Kameron held Brooke tighter.

The song ended and someone brought more kindling for the fire, which had shrunk considerably by this point in the evening. What happened next was twofold: green grass and dry reeds were dropped on the blaze, and the wind changed. Vanessa, who had been seated in front of Manila, between Jujubee and Mariah, where she felt safe and like she belonged, was suddenly hit with a curtain of fresh black smoke. The others leaned out of the way, shifted to avoid the mass, but when that black curtain wafted toward Vanessa, her whole body stiffened, her eyes glazing over. Nina, who was only a few feet away, left where she was sitting to go over to her friend, as she was starting to cough. Vanessa started to shriek, howl in fear and pain and the sound was animal, and wrenched something primal within all who were gathered. All chatter died in an instant, and eyes turned to Nina, who was closest now, as she reached out and grabbed Vanessa by the arm. 

As soon as Nina had made contact, she was grabbed and thrown to the dirt beside Vanessa. The gathered crowd thought they heard a voice unlike Vanessa’s that shouted _“Geddown!”_ The small girl swung her leg over Nina’s body so she was crouched over the taller woman. The arm Nina had grabbed was now raised above her face, to protect her features from invisible falling debris. 

Nina looked up at her friend, unable to see her eyes for the hair that hung around her face, but Vanessa’s mouth was ground shut, tendons in her neck visible with strain. Nina felt nerves flutter in her chest; nevertheless she reached up to take Vanessa’s hand in her own. “Vanessa.”

She caught a flicker of motion above her as Vanessa’s eyelashes signaled her waking. Nina placed her other hand on Vanessa’s shoulder -- just in time too, as the girl collapsed choking and wheezing in her arms. She babbled syllables, trying to communicate what she’d seen, but couldn’t. Nina pulled Vanessa further into her embrace, petting her hair, running her fingers over her sweaty forehead, gently rocking from one hip to another. 

It may have been the head of hair tucked into her throat, or the hands clutching the baby hairs at the nape of her neck, or the motion of the rocking, but suddenly Nina was transported far away from the fire and her friends. Instead, she felt a deep, instinctual, protective kind of tenderness. A frightening kind of love, planted in the center of her chest. And she was rocking, and a much smaller and paler hand held on to the neckline of her nightgown. And this tightness in her womb, this ghostly feeling in her breasts, and knowing the preciousness of what she held in her arms… and then it was gone.

And she was back at the fire, and some people had begun talking again, and there was the wrong person in her arms, and she didn’t know who it was for a moment. Nina gazed around for someone’s face, some expression that signaled to her… something. Maybe that she wasn’t going mad. Or that she was. There was a curious somber expression on one of the Visitors faces, but Nina passed over it. Instead, her gaze found its way over to her friends Brooke and Kameron. And their eyes… were different. 

Reluctant to untangle Vanessa from herself, Nina motioned for her friends to come over, and they did. Brooke, seeming to favor her left leg; Kameron, embracing herself. They sat beside her, and Nina looked to them, at a loss for words. She didn’t know what she needed of them. Thankfully for Nina, her friends did know.

“You saw something, didn’t you?” said Brooke. “A flash, something…”

“Maybe not even that much of a vision,” Kameron amended. “But a feeling.”

Nina nodded against Vanessa’s hair. She felt the girl in her arms move her head ever so slightly. A feeling of security spread from her chest. At least she wasn’t alone in this. “I can’t explain it,” said Nina.

“I can.”

The four women looked up to the source of the voice. It was Ra’Jah, the leader of the visitors. “If you’ll let us, we have one more tradition to share with you all.”

\--

Two women in red shirts hauled a weather-beaten wicker chest through the door into the must-smelling den that Lieutenant Sasha Velour called their sanctuary. The lieutenant’s fashionably shaved head reflected the many sources of light around the room, under all of which stoof stacks of papers. All of which bore text of great significance, which Velour would elucidate in full to anyone naive enough to ask. 

Today, Monet from transport and A’keria from admin did not come to Velour’s den to ask about poetry, philosophy or tactical linguistics. Their cargo was all the explanation they needed. The chest creaked under its own weight. A’keria and Monet let it thump to the floor. 

Lieutenant Sasha Velour turned around in their chair. They looked straight past their shipmates, wasting no time on greetings. They stood, eyes fixed on the cargo. Monet and A’keria practically watched the gears in Sasha’s head whir to life, turning faster and faster the more they sized up their assignment. 

The first thing to come out of Velour’s mouth was “May I deconstruct the container? I would hate to damage its contents in removing them.”

Monet shook her head. “No can do, Sash. We gotta return the thing in a couple hours.”

Sasha nodded quickly and pulled a set of spectacles from the top of their desk. Without looking, they reached down and pulled a pair of white cotton gloves from one of their drawers. “Hand woven, and dried too, with little breakage, and to think the makers had only years of experience… absolutely fascinating.”

A’keria cleared her throat. “I hate to rush you, you know, but we need the actual volumes inside the thing analyzed as soon as possible.”

“Of course.” Sasha nodded. It didn’t appear that they had blinked since the women walked in. “Open it then. And help me lift out the stacks. Try and keep them in order, the good stuff will be at the bottom, also most likely to be badly warped, so do be gentle.”

Monet cracked a smile. “When am I anything but gentle?”

A’keria rolled her eyes at Monet. 

“Whaat?”

A’keria didn’t answer. If Sasha had heard the conversation, they openly ignored it. Finally at the bottom of the stacks of journals, Sasha brought the brown, wrinkly bound notebooks over to their desk. Pulling their overhead magnifier to rest above the book, Sasha gingerly pulled the front cover away from the pages. 

The text was written in what some might call a ‘fancy’ hand, the kind developed in children of a certain class in certain schools on Alpha Earth. The even scrawl was most legible closest to the binding, blurring out and becoming too muddy to read nearer the edge of the page. Lieutenant Velour dictated the first line:

_Day 2. Here marks the first hand recording of records from the settlement of the full 37-person crew of UFS: Magnaven._


	7. Witness

The women gathered around, holding each other to keep warm in the cool night, looking up at the great elm. The tree was massive, though not as old as the visiting crew originally thought. Its broad, light colored trunk was the best surface to project onto, so this tree served as the film screen. It was upon this elm the _Sappho’s_ crew displayed what video files they had been able to gather in hopes of jogging their commanding officers' memories. With the wine all imbibed, its antidote would be working from within their bodies on a cellular level, helping their systems break down the psychoactive effects of the pollen. From what Asia could gather just watching her crewmates’ faces, it was already happening. All they needed to do was drive it home.

They started their presentation with the group photo that was taken the day the Sappho left the bay, headed for deep space. Audio also played, and the figures within the photo started to move. Nina was in the front, where captains belong, her gold cravat reflecting shreds of light as she moved. To her right side was Brooke, her long blonde hair swooped to one side, and styled to stay that way for the photo. This Brooke’s hair was a good six inches shorter than the woman who lay out in the grass, holding tight to Kameron’s hand and her own ankle. 

Projected onto the elm, the captain nudged Brooke’s shoulder with her own. “Look around you, all these ladies are gonna depend on you if anything bad happens to me,” said Nina from the hidden speakers. “You ready for that?”

Brooke made an awkward face and glanced back at the others. “Uh, Officer O’Hara, you’d better keep the old maid healthy!” She cracked. “Because I’m not down for this much responsibility!”

Two seats to Nina’s left sat Asia, her hair also done up for the special occasion, her blue cravat crisp to perfection. Behind Brooke sat Ra’Jah, looking very confused. “Oh!” she exclaimed once she realized. “Your last name is _also_ O’Hara!” Asia nodded. “Mm, we might have to do something about that. Come up with a nickname.”

Asia petted one side of her large hair puff. “Mm. Do we need a nickname? For _Chief Medical_ Officer O’Hara, compared to _Assistant_ Science Officer O’Hara?”

Nina and Brooke _‘ooh’_ ed in their seats. From behind the camera, a firm voice chastised, “Ladiiess, the sooner you learn to get along, the better. Go on and leave your petty differences right here, before you hit deep space.”

The moment the woman raised her voice, every crew member in view straightened up in her seat, eyes forward, hands in their laps like well trained children. Thirty voices echoed around the glen: “Yes, Commander Royale.”

“And where the _hell_ is Mateo?”

In the glen, Vanessa sat up ramrod straight. She whirled around to glare at the visitors. What was this game they were playing?! Before she could get up to throw hands, she was struck by the sound of her own voice over the speakers. “SOOOOORRY SORRY!” A short tan girl walked into frame. Her chestnut locks were all frizzed up on top of her head, and she had her red bandana tied around her head instead of around her neck. A few of the other crew members wore their identifiers this way, but it still set her apart when she went to take her empty seat behind Kameron. The attitude in the room towards the latecomer was palpable, as everyone had to move over a seat to let her in. 

The shadow of an arm was visible as Commander Royale spoke again. “Chiiild, this is cuttin’ it close.” The Vanessa in the video avoided looking at her commander. 

The Vanessa in the glen had her stomach twisting under Royale’s death stare. 

“Miss West, or now, Captain West.” Nina’s head snapped up, tiny wheels in her brain clicking into motion. “God help you to wrangle this crew.” The Nina in the video nodded, her lips pressed together, her posture astute. 

The image shifted into a semi-populated ballroom, with multiple intelligent aliens milling about. On the far wall was a door, which Kameron guarded with a stoic expression. The suction sound of the door opening struck all those gathered, even if most of them ignored the sensation. Vanessa marched out of the door, and Kameron hit a button on her tablet. The white light lining the door turned red, locking everyone inside. Vanessa whipped out her Fazer (set to stun, of course) and pointed it at a bright turquoise alien with six tentacles and half a dozen eyes. “Stop right there!”

The turquoise being made sounds to defend themself, translating roughly to ‘what is the meaning of this’ and ‘how rude’. In a clear, confident voice, Vanessa explained as the crowd parted to stand behind her. “Malgak ratted us out to the Romulans!”

In the glen, Vanessa pulled Nina so she would hear what she whispered into her maybe-captain’s ear. “He was… telling them about them refugees. So the Rom’s could intercede us and take them as prisoners of war.”

Nina turned to Vanessa. “You mean intercept?”

Up on the elm, Vanessa continued, “You thought you was sneaky sendin’ that encrypted message to Quad Two. Forgettin’ we _know_ ‘bout that Rommie outpost in Quad Two. All to collect twelve innocent beings who got stuck in the crossfire, just lookin’ for solomon.”

“Asylum,” supplied Kameron.

“Right! Asylum! Thank you!” Vanessa grabbed one of the being’s tentacles. “Now! We’re takin’ you to the bridge!”

“D’you mean the _brig?”_ asked Kameron. She came over to the other side of Maglak the betrayer to help Vanessa guide him to the elevator.

Vanessa huffed. “Same difference.”

The door opened and the scene shifted again. This time, they were outside, in a kind of jungle. Captain Nina was chewing the corner of her lip and glancing anxiously from her tablet to something in the distance. Foliage cracked as vanessa jumped into the clearing, battered and covered in some kind of black ooze. She coughed, trying to catch her breath while Nina half-ran over to her. Grabbing her shoulder, Nina demanded to know if Kameron was close behind.

“Wha--” Vanessa coughed. “She’s not here yet?”

“UM, obviously fuckin’ NOT!” squawked a woman who they would recognize as Ra’Jah, the other O’Hara.

Nina pinged the bridge. “Status update on Michaels, _now.”_

Katya’s voice answered back immediately. “Definitely alive, elevated breathing and heart rate, she’s been running. She’s headed for your location, you should see her momentarily -- weird though, it kinda looks like she’s flying--”

“Oh my God.”

They looked again at Ra’Jah. Her chin was tilted up and she was pointing at the sky. Unbelievably, kameron was in the process of floating down towards her crew members. She was holding onto a whirlygig-looking gadget with one hand, and an oversized lizard with the other. The gadget’s spinning blades slowed down until she was standing on the ground with everyone else. She tossed the gadget to the side and went to remove a bandage from around the lizard’s jaw. Once it was released, a large holographic marble fell from the reptile’s mouth. Kameron caught the marble before it dropped into the dirt. “Right, we’re good. You can tell Bree they can beam us up whenever.”

She offered no further explanation, even when they did get back to the Sappho. She twisted the marble to unlock it, and ten people appeared out of it. The leader of the marble people, all of whom had purple skin and gills on their heads, was the queen, the one who had sent out the distress call. At the time she and her people came aboard, she had no name, but in time she chose to be called Atabey. There was political unrest in her kingdom, and she sent out the call for asylum after hearing of her husband’s plot to destroy her, her family and their children, including one she was still gestating. Asia had helped deliver that child. Tried to help, more like. There wasn’t much she could do. After the birth, the captain had visited the refugee queen, a sense of longing in her arms and chest. She had told Asia that it felt as if all her time of missing her children had hit her all at once, and she just needed to hold the stranger’s child. The queen, thankfully, had understood.

After the snapshots from _the Sappho’s_ adventures, the video package was slated to show pieces of the women’s lives before Star Fleet. The first clips showed the ranch where Nina grew up with her mother and siblings, where she gave birth to and nursed her own two children. The footage showed Nina in a long blue skirt, a bundle in her arms as she walked out into the grass to introduce the new addition to the other children. In the glade, Nina hugged herself and dug her nails into her arm. 

That nagging feeling was back in Asia. Whenever it happened-- that grief, that longing-- Nina wouldn’t be herself for up to a week. Thankfully, when it did, everyone was able to carry on without Nina’s leadership for a short while. But now, with this reminder, Asia worried.

Nina’s segment melted into a stage of four ballerinas, all moving in synchronization. They rose to stand on their right leg, balanced only on the point of their toes. Then, the one second from the end crumpled to the floor. Brooke winced, holding her ankle with both hands, unable to breathe. Asia paid close attention to Brooke’s leg before the fall, trying to isolate the moment that the ligament snapped. She had been, as yet, unsuccessful. How Brooke was holding that leg now, pearlescent tears making the profile of her cheeks shine, worried Asia. Brooke had said three weeks ago she was feeling great, and maybe wouldn’t need physical therapy anymore, close to a decade after the fall. She had been so excited. Asia sighed.

Last, because they didn’t have any more footage for Kameron, was Vanessa’s section. Unlike the other three, Vanessa hadn’t had another career before joining Star Fleet. She had joined the Academy right out of secondary school (though she took an extra year to complete secondary school due to extenuating circumstances). The footage they showed now was the exact footage that had put her on Star Fleet’s radar in the first place. The smoggy skyline of a decaying Alpha Earth city in the evening served as background to the office fire. Now as she saw the footage again from the outside, Vanessa Remembered. Viscerally. Her lungs seized up, her lips going numb.

Shards of glass rained down from somewhere above when a window broke under the heat. Many people chattered in English and Spanish and Korean and she knew almost every voice. Neighbors. A fire truck arrived just in time to see a figure, a small child, topple to the ground outside a window on the ground floor. The boy skidded on his arms, knees and chin. Soot and ash dirtied his face and he coughed as a firewoman ran up to grab him. She carried the boy out of view, but by this point, there was another figure coming into view. A bony teenage girl, one who hardly looked able to lift a five pound dumbbell. Her hair singed, her head and shoulders dusted with ash, and she hobbled out of the building, weighed down by small bodies. She could still feel their weight on her back. She recalled clutching their hands in front of her neck, so she wouldn’t lose them. No matter what. Nina rubbed her back, managing to get her body to pull in a shallow breath. Her lungs still burned. The smoke was still in her eyes. Her legs… she couldn’t feel them. The nerves had all melted by then. She watched her younger self fall to one knee in the gravel as two, three firefighters ran up to her. She remembered the screaming of her throat when she screamed at them, only for it to come out as a whisper. There’s still more in there.

One of them, a man, ran into the blaze as soon as he heard her whispering scream. Another guy ran in, a medic, to press an instrument against the kids’ backs as a firewoman helped pull the kids off Vanessa. Someone pushed out a knee to break her fall when Vanessa passed out into the gravel. 

“Vanessa.” Nina’s voice was far away. Hand still rubbing her back, trying to get her to breathe. “Ness. That was long ago, that’s not now. Okay?”

Someone else said, “Breathe, Mateo.” It was a voice that immediately triggered obedience. A voice she was used to hearing give commands.

She started gasping, pulling fresh, cool, clean night air into her lungs and it chased away the smoke. Or the memory of smoke. If there ever was any. The projections had, by this point, ended. Now Ra’Jah stood with Asia and April among the rest of the ladies. The strangers, who now were more familiar than anyone else in that glen, addressed everyone. “We don’t show you these things to make you upset,” said Ra’Jah.

 _Fucking did though, didn’t you?_ Vanessa would have yelled if she had the strength. 

Instead, Ra’Jah continued “We don’t show you this to frighten you either. That’s not what we want.”

“It’s what you got though,” snapped Kameron. Vanessa nodded.

Ra’Jah held up her palms. “It wasn’t the goal.”

For the first time, Manila spoke up. “What _was_ your goal, then? Ingratiate yourselves only to traumatize our sisters?”

“You’re really cruel!” shouted someone from the crowd. A rumble of discontent made its way through those gathered.

Asia stepped up to deal with the rowdy women. “We’re leaving, okay? We’re going.” The group was momentarily pacified. Asia continued, “We just want to give you all the knowledge that you may leave with us if you want. We can offer you calm, can offer you family, and explanations of the things you witnessed and remembered tonight.”

“Yeah, we’re not kidnapping anyone tonight,” Ra’Jah fibbed. It was fully Plan B to beam the others up if they refused. Call her cruel, but she wasn’t about to let her friends and superiors get court-martialed for going AWOL. “But know that when we walk away, any of you may follow.”

Nina looked to Brooke. Brooke looked to Kameron, and Kameron looked to Vanessa. 

Manila looked over to the four of them, but when she spoke, she spoke to Vanessa. “You don’t have to go anywhere,” she said. “You are a part of us now.”

Nina looked into the dirt. She’d known her choice ever since she felt the memory of her son. Her son whose name she could not remember. The visitors turned around slowly, and Nina guided Vanessa's weight onto Brooke Lynn. Without looking her friends in the eyes again, Nina rose to her feet and began to follow. 

Brooke looked to Kameron, and Vanessa looked up at the both of them. Brooke rose to her feet, and so did Vanessa, though she couldn’t stand up straight quite yet. Kameron, however, lagged in her decision making. But she looked to her sisters around the firepit, and she watched her friends, and the farther away Brooke, Vanessa and Nina were, the more Kameron understood that her path followed where those women led.

\---

After re-materializing on _the Sappho,_ Ra’Jah excused herself to call up and start a meeting. After a quick vacuum-decontamination, the captain was off, leaving Asia and April with instructions to decontaminate their cohorts. 

All six women filed into the decontamination chamber: a long room with water spouts on the ceiling and one long drain down the middle of the floor. racks of conditioners, antiseptics, soaps and the like lined the walls. Asia and April began disrobing, the others following their example.

From the walls Asia and April pulled handheld waterspouts and began hosing the other women down. Then came the shampooing, a foaming solution that the women worked into their hair to kill off whatever small insects and break up any pollen that still clung to them.

It was during the shampooing also that Nina, Vanessa, Brooke, and Kameron started to become aware that they were naked together. And the sense, coming back to them, that they ought to have some privacy. Some modesty. Something. April caught the difference in the women’s behavior first and assured them “We’re all women together. Bodies are nothing to be ashamed of.” 

Her words soothed some of the gathering nerves. However, they could not allow themselves to look upon each other naked as they had back on the planet. Four pairs of eyes fixed themselves on the drains, or else on the pattern of the tiles in the shower room. 

Once April and Asia were satisfied with their decontamination, the returning crew members were given examination smocks to wear. The almost paper garments were standard for patients, but they didn’t leave much to the imagination. Asia administered booster shots to keep the pollen effects at bay until she could start the full detox treatment, then provided soft dressing gowns for her shipmates to cover themselves. April offered the dehydrator to help dry the women’s hair, but Nina said that they’d be alright just air-drying. Asia supposed it was understandable that they would resist certain technologies for a while as they continued to acclimate back to life aboard a starship.

Decontaminated, toweled off and redressed, Nina, Brooke, Kameron, and Vanessa were led into a lift and down a corridor until finally they entered a meeting room. One circular table took up the middle of the room, surrounded by Ra’Jah and other not-strangers. “Welcome back, captain,” said one of them.

Nina said nothing at first, wondering why everyone was looking at her. A lady with compassionate eyes and purple hair asked in a husky voice, “Nina, how are you feeling?”

“Uh,” said Nina. “Alright I guess. A little…” she looked at Ra’Jah to gauge what she was and wasn’t supposed to say. “Unsure.”

Ra’Jah reached a hand in Nina’s general direction. “Would it be fair, Nina, for me to offer my continued service as interim Captain for the time being? Until you have time to rest, reflect and recharge after what must have been a hell of an experience.”

Nina visibly relaxed and nodded fervently. _Yes, please, don’t put me in charge of anything right now._

“Alright,” said Ra’Jah. “So I’ll just continue this meeting now that you’re here and we're all caught up. Lieutenant Velour, would you care to share what you’ve uncovered from the _Magnaven_ journals?”

“Absolutely.” A bald intellectual stood from their chair and stepped back from the table. As they spoke, they started to pace the room. “I’ll start with why the planet has a breathable atmosphere and familiar flora and fauna to those found on Alpha Earth. The answer is obviously that the planet we will call Bilitis was terraformed by Star Fleet or some other earth-based organization with the intention to set up a colony. So why is the wrecked _Magnaven_ the only group to colonize? Records show that Bilitis, among many other planets, was intended for colonization and the terraforming started, but due to budget constraints, whoever started the terraforming had to abandon preparation of a number of planets to focus on the few that had the highest chance of successful colonization in the shortest amount of time.”

Nina had never questioned the presence of anything while she was on the planet. Not the elm, not the lake, not the berries or the fruit or the fish. Now though, as she digested what Velour -- Saoirse? It had a ‘zh’ or a ‘sh’ sound in the middle -- said, she was starting to understand. 

Someone raised their voice when Velour took a pause. “So what about _Magnaven_ though? Once they got there, how was it not just a barren wasteland? How is it still livable without continued support from StarFleet?”

Sasha’s face lit up. Sasha! Nina gasped, only to shy away from the faces that turned to look at her. She focused instead on Sasha as they further explained, albeit somewhat giddily. 

“Right! Okay, fascinating question actually. Captain Luzon’s journals covered this and it turns out Bilitis is unique in that the developers tested a kind of airborne hormonal agent that triggers a reproductive season in every living organism on the planet. And it’s this mating season that has managed the atmosphere and the ecosphere all this time.” Sasha paused. “This season, which Luzon calls ‘the flowering season’ affects everything-- from the fish to the rabbits to the trees and the grass and the _people._

“Every eight months, the Flowering Season comes, and every time it does, Luzon’s accounts skip forward to when it ends. They have very little memory of what happens during the season once it ends, and when it does, the first thing Luzon does is seek out her last account so the group can try and catch up to, if not pick up where they left off.” 

Ra’Jah spoke up now. “So Sasha, with your research and your talents… What do you suggest we do now? We can’t just leave thirty of Star Fleet’s finest drifting in deep space. We can’t just abduct them either-- they’re not gonna be convinced to leave. They’ve forgotten life before what, yesterday?”

Sasha nodded, folding their hands. “You know, I actually thought of that. So we’re sending the accounts and the chest that contained them, back down to Bilitis. I included a note of my own in the most recent journal for when Luzon checks back after the end of this Flowering Season. She’ll find all the pieces for a location beacon tucked between the pages of the journals, to be reconstructed and activated when they’re in their right minds. This way, when rescue comes, it won’t come too soon, like we did. Unfortunately.”

“So we just… leave?” asked Kameron.

Ra’Jah looked at her. “We continue on with our mission.”

“We have left Luzon and her crew the necessary tools to call for rescue, notified Star Fleet of the known location of Magnaven’s crew, and rescued our own.” Sasha spread her hands. “What else is there to be done?”

Kameron looked between Brooke and Nina, neither of whom could be of much help. “Nothing, I guess.”

“If you do come up with another way we can help our or fellow women,” said Ra’Jah. “Don’t keep it to yourself, yeah?”

Kameron nodded stiffly. 

“Well, if that’s the end of the meeting,” said Asia, standing up from her seat. “I have four blood treatments to start. So if you’ll excuse us, we’re gonna be off to the clinic.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> subscribe to the series and stick around for the epilogue coming soon

**Author's Note:**

> I have the majority of this fic written, I just lost the motivation to finish this ONE SCENE later on. Hoping reader feedback will rejuvenate that motivation, so im gonna start posting/


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